With the return of PE, we also decided that the long absent opinion columns section would make a come back as well. The people represented here have either been requested to write regular opinion columns or have asked to do so. This section is very much in the (re)formulative stage at this point and we will work hard to add the voices the of women, GLB, as well ethnic and economic minorities from within the movement. Remember that opinions expressed are not necessarily those held by the PE editorial collective as as a whole...

When Good Intentions Aren't Good Enough...

I heard a rumor once. In fact I've heard it more than once and in several different variations. It started around the time we announced the breakup of the Profane Existence Collective, in October of 1998. It went something like this: "Dan took all the money he made from Profane Existence and used it buy a house." There were other rumors too. Many being spread by "respected" individuals within the movement with apparantly no other intention other than to make themselves look better at the expense of Profane Existence and it's former members. It was an ugly time and brought out the worst in people; vindictiveness, dishonesty, and even jealousy. It's easy to point out shortcomings of someone else when they fail, especially when your own ego is on the line.

To set things straight once and for all, I will flat out say that I have NEVER made any profit from all the years of my involvement with Profane Existence. When Profane Existence started paying wages in 1996, I always made sure the other workers were paid first, which sometimes meant waiting several months between pay checks. Even when there was money to pay myself, I never received more than minimum wage due to the 40 hours maximum pay we imposed on ourselves, all the while spending 50-60 hours a week working.

When Laura became pregnant the first time, we both took a serious look at our situation. We both agreed that we wanted to buy a house. We wanted to raise our new family in a better environment than a shithole, delapidated apartment for which we paid each month to a lazy, parasitic, landlord. Buying a house isn't just something you go out and do on a whim - you have to work towards it and that is we did. Even after our first daughter died we stuck to our goal, and shortly before Athena was born we moved into house. Where did the money come from? We worked and we saved. It took nearly two years to save the money for a down payment and to establish credit. We now pay the bank directly, which is far cheaper than renting an over priced apartment in danger of imminent collapse.

Did Profane Existence play a factor in Laura and I buying a house? Yes, but it wasn't in the form of "collatoral" for our house, as one rumor puts it. In fact, in the eyes of any bank, my status as legal owner of Profane Existence was a liability, not an asset. The role the Profane Existence played in the buying of our house was in fact a negative one and actually held us back by limiting the size of house we could buy. Banks don't lend money to self-employed people, only to those who can prove they are faithful wage slaves.

The fact that Profane Existence has nearly always been in debt certainly helped create such rumors in ignorant peoples' minds, thus beginning a rumor that set me up as the scapegoat for PE's financial troubles and ultimate demise.

No other person has contributed more money or endured more financial hardship because of PE than myself. In the early days of PE I contributed over half the wages I earned at my full time job to pay for printing PE magazine. The rest of my money went to rent and I often found myself with nothing left for food or anything else. In fact there were weeks when my entire dietary intake was what I could stuff in my face while at work. My upstairs neighbor Felix Von Havoc used to invite me up regularly on my weekends for soup or bring me dumpstered food just to be sure I had something to eat. As the years went by I regularly contributed any extra money I could come up with for the cause, twice selling off chunks of my record collection. Once in order to put out records and then later to buy a computer for PE. When Profane Existence ended, I was in debt $3000 to the bank for records put out by Profane Existence on my Visa card, which I has still not been able to pay off completely even to this day.

In the aftermath of PE I was left with the responsibility of cleaning up the finances. The final figures left PE with something close to $30,000 worth of unpaid invoices, bills and royalties. On paper much of this could have been paid for by the people who owed money to Profane Existence, but collecting outstanding debts proved to be pretty much impossible. Many people simply chose to disappear or blatantly ignored pleas for payment. In fact I eventually gave up actively trying to collect PE's old debts in May of last year when I realized I was spending more money on phone calls and letters than I was actually getting back for PE.

In an effort to pay the money PE still owed, I once again started selling off my record collection and managed to raise about $11,000 in the process. With that I was able to put out the Decrepit 12" - that final release on Profane Existence Records. I also put together and paid for the Aftermath LP and CD compilations to benefit PE. I also repressed more than a dozen records on the Profane Existence label, all with the goal of paying back the money still owed by PE. So far nearly $15,000 in old debts have been paid off as a direct results of my efforts and more being paid all the time. Mind you that all of this has taken place AFTER the end of Profane Existence by someone who supposedly fucked over PE and the scene.

Has this left me bitter? If it did I wouldn't be back writing this column or putting out this magazine Has it left me angry? Yes. Very. I am angered when I hear some ignorant fool spout off about how Dan or Mandy ran off with all the collective's money. I am angered when bands tell me they did not contribute to the Aftermath compilation because of a rumor they heard. I am angered when people tell me they are going to pay their debts to PE and never do. I am angered when I don't know what to tell people like Jari from Finn Records, Alain from Nabate, Michael from Common Cause, etc. etc... each time they ask when they will be paid the money still owed to them by Profane Existence. Every time I go over to the puny remains of my record collection to play one of my favorite albums and find it gone it's like putting salt on a deep wound.

I will admit to partial responsibility for the financial pickle that ultimately destroyed PE. I will admit to my share of bad decisions, poor planning and even the occasional misuse of PE funds (OK, I thought a keg of beer would be a GOOD thing at a "Soy not Oi!" stuffing party). There were also things outside of anyone's control that helped hastened the end of the collective; like a fucked up landlord, a fire in the building we were supposed to move PE into, an crippling UPS strike, and even major hassles and steep fines from the IRS.

However, the biggest contributing factor to the financial ruin of PE were the enormous amounts of people who ripped off the collective over the years, whether by accident or design. When Profane Existence ended in 1998 I warned people who still owed the colletive money that would have until May of 1999 to pay or their names would be posted in MRR, Heart Attack, and on our web site. I did in fact briefly post the list on PE's web site, which did bring in some small results, but I removed the list for revision and didn't bother to repost it until just a little while ago. Deciding it's now time to make good on my threat, and more than a year after the deadline, I have decided to publish the list. And what better vehicle to do it than in Profane Existence Magazine itself!?

THE PROFANE EXISTENCE SHITLIST
***NOTE: those who have paid or are paying their debts have been removed from this list.
For public record, here is a partial list of of the people who contributed to PE's demise by ducking out on their debts to the former collective. Any help tracking them down or other persuasive measures are welcomed. Please note that the list below only represents unpaid debts from the last 3 years of the Profane Existence Collective's 10 years of operation. It also does not show the dozens of unpaid debts less than $50, the myriad bad / stolen checks, or any of the trade scams the collective fell victim to. There are also other distributors and labels who still owe money to PE, but are not on this list because they are actively paying off their debts.

Profane Earth (Dinsdale, New Zealand) - $1610.40 These former "official PE distributors" Sean Carmichal and Lindz ? blatantly lied and cheated PE out of more money than most others combined. They were rumored to have moved to the Gold Coast of Australia, but recent sightings have confirmed their location in NZ.

Southern Black Cross (Sydney, Australia) - $910.15 Another "official PE distributor" Andrew Dove failed to send payment or trades for orders made in 1996-1997. Always a difficult distributor to deal with, but then finally disappeared for good in 1998. (It is interesting to point out that the first PE distributors for Australia and New Zealand also ripped the collective off during the early 90s)

AZ Distribution (Pavia, Italy) - $854.00 Yet again stabbed in the back by "official PE distributors," Luca and Piero decided they would rather rave than distribute punk records. Thanks to the Agipunks folks who were able to rescue $200 worth of our records when these clowns dropped out of the scene.

Fine Print Distribution (Austin, TX) - approx. $800.00 This was a big zine distributor that went bankrupt in about 1997. We still have not received even a partial payment although proper papers were filed with the courts. Exact amount owed is unclear because inventory reports stopped several months before the motion for bankrupsy.

Chris Gilberds (Edmonton, Canada) - $682.80
Pulled money order scams and other deceptions to rip off PE in 1997. Last we heard this fuckface is in hiding in fear of his life - and so he should be!

Villa Varvara Infoshop (Thessaloniki, Greece) - $529.68 An info shop formerly run out of squat in Greece. The person who made all of the orders, Gekas Sotiris, claimed he quit the collective shortly thereafter and this therefore not responsible for paying back the debt. Unfortunately he wasn't willing to supply us with the info as to what became of the stuff that was sent or exactly who WAS responsible.

See-Hear (NYC) - $250.00 How many times do you hear "the check is in the mail" before you stop believing it! Boycott this lying sack of shit!

E.G. Smith Collective (Columbus, OH) - approx. $250.00 A distributor and publisher that disappeared in 1998. Exact amount owed is unclear becasue they failed to send an invoice for items given to us in trade during late 1997.

Rafal Kasprzak (Poland) - $150+ Another former "official PE distributor," but could never live up to his "good intentions." The "+" indicates his actual debt to PE is much, much higher, but we decided to forgive the rest of his debt if he at least paid for his debt for PE magazines. That was in 1997. So much for good intentions.

Wow Cool (Berkeley, CA) - $104.57 Getting payment from these zine / book distributors was always like pulling teeth and we finally just stopped sending them zines because it wasn't worth the hassle. Apparently they decided they would just stop sending payments too.

Ivo Mathé (Prague, Czech Republic) - $82.50
Claimed he will pay soon - two years ago!

The Boiler Room (Nelson, BC, Canada) - $59.50
The usual story of good intentions gone bad.

Moon Mystique (Iowa City, IA) - $53.00 A comic / magazine shop that was always late with payments and finally just fucked off on their last couple of invoices (sources say the owner moved to Chicago to join the junkie / Goth scene).

AND SO THE CYCLE CONTINUES?
Shortly after PE ended, Joe and I decided we wanted to carry on some sort of distribution to maintain availability of remaining PE titles and to continue to distribute Skuld Release for North America (Skuld was formerly PE's partner label for Europe). This we called Blackened Distribution and has grown to become one of the largest distributors to the North American DIY punk movement. We even set up an interface on our web site that allowed us to accept credit cards as payment to speed up the ordering process.

Having things gone smoothly for more than a year, we let down our guard and were taken for over $1000 by two different people on opposite sides of the world. Both people placed substantial wholesale and mail orders using what turned out to be stolen credit cards. Before we figured out what had happened, we had sent out several large orders to both people, one to a person Malaysia and the other in Yugoslavia. In both cases the perpetrators said they thought it was going to be the credit card or insurance companies who had to pay back the money but that's not how credit cards work and Blackened had to pay back the cash.

Do we hunt them down and kill them like Bob from Sound Idea has seriously suggested (he too was ripped off). I personally think that's going a just a little too far, but I still can't help feeling utterly disgusted by the harm caused by these people's ignorance. Both people have said they made mistakes and have apologized for hurting the DIY movement. The person in Malaysia, who ordered the most, has claimed he will pay back the money, while the other person in Yuguslavia has stated he can not, but will try to help repair the harm done. The net result is Blackened can no longer accept credit card payments from people overseas, because not only do we have to pay back money for orders placed with stolen credit cards, but we're also in danger of losing the ability to accept them period. It has has also meant that Blackened has been forced to raise prices again, because we're not only paying off PE's old debts, but now this new set back on top of it.

In the face of all of this, you would think I would have just given up for good, and some probably think I should. However, just as we said when we disbanded the collective in 1998, we have not given up on the politics and of the anarcho-punk movement. I have stayed involved with the movement, taking a more behind the scenes role starting Blackened Distribution with Joe. While I originally intended to work as a professional web site developer and just do Blackened as an after work thing. In the end it turned out that Blackened became the full time job and my computer skills have been put to use to make the PE and Blackened web sites state of the art.

With the exception of Mandy, who has since moved to Portland, all of the remaining of line-up of the PE collective are still active in the movement here. My daughter is now two years old and no longer requires the constant attention as she did as an infant, After a year and a half without an issue of PE Magazine, and seeing our high hopes for a replacement shattered, the only logical conclusion to achieve was to bring PE back. So here we are, in spite of all the bullshit, in spite of all the lies, in spite of the hard feelings, in spite of the fucking world.... WE'RE BACK!

ADDENDUM:
A Tale of Two Friends and a Dead Label
I wasn't planning to write about the details of Profane Existence Records in this issue, but I have been prompted to write by the fact that I was just recently accosted by an ex- band member, over supposed royalties he erronously believes he is still owed for two records put out by PE in 1996 and 1997. The person in regards to this is Pignose, singer from the band Assrash, and someone I very much want to remain friends with. However there is a gross misunderstanding keeping this from happening and has nearly resulted in a physical confrontation.

First I should explain the "inner workings" of Profane Existence Records and our standard "deal" we make with the bands. Since the beginning, Profane Existence has offered all it's bands a 50/50 split on all net profit, which means they make half of the money from sales, minus PE's expenses. Bands who pay for their own recordings have a 60/40 split, which means they get 60% of all money from sales minus PE's expenses. This generally worked out to 15% and 20% of the gross sales from the total pressings respectively, and these are numbers we told the bands. Bands who pay for their own recording stand to make far more back in royalties, especially if the record sells more than one pressing. It should also be pointed out that PE has paid the recording cost of all but a very small hand full of the forty-something records we released.

How the bands get paid is either in one or two ways. The first way, which is most common, is the bands simply take their royalties in records. This works best for the bands because they can take the records on tour and start getting "paid" for them immediately. The second way is for PE to sell their royalty copies and then pay the band afterwards. This usually only happens in the case of bands that are broken up, or are really popular and can't keep up with selling all of the royalty copies they receive. This isn't as good for the bands for two reasons: First, we sell our stock of records before we start in on the band copies. This makes sense, because it was our money invested in making them in the first place (which usually meant a loan from friends and/or family, which had to be paid back). This could mean the band may have to wait several month (or even years) before they start receiving payment for their record. The second reason this method isn't as good for the bands is because they will only be paid the amount of money which we sold the records for. Over 90% of all PE records are sold wholesale to other distributors, which means a relatively low average sales price (something like $1.75 per 7" and $4.75 per LP / CD). If the band were to sell the records at shows, they would be able to charge a little bit more money, thus making back even more for their efforts.

It should also be said that PE never made a written contract with any band on the label, because the deal was always explained in advance AND we felt that a verbal agreement with friends is all that was ever needed. In the over all scheme of the world, PE was a tiny label and most bands never balked at the prospect of not making a lot of money from their records, especially when 2000+ copies is a VERY GOOD selling record! In most cases the bands have been surprised to receive anything at all. I'm not saying that bands should expect to make nothing back for their efforts, but there really isn't a whole lot of money to be made from a DIY released record either.

Now I want to talk about Assrash in particular. In a nutshell, Pignose believes the band never received any royalties for their records released on PE. This is in spite of the fact that we had given them hundreds of records and finally checks for the copies we sold after the band broke up in 1997. This insistence by Pignose has been a thorn in the relationship between him and several other former PE members, and now finally with myself. This reoccurring issue has also the principal reason that the Assrash LP has been overlooked several times when money became available to do represses. I'm not writing this with the intent of putting Pignose down, but I do want my explanation to go on public record and hopefully put this behind us once and for all. There's no reason we shouldn't be friends, but it seems like this is just going to keep coming up time and time again.

PE put out two different records from Assrash, their 7" EP in 1996 and their LP in 1997. In both cases PE paid for the recording and in both cases the band was paid in their customary 15% cut of the records. Because the band broke up shortly after recording their LP, the band didn't have much use for their 300 copies, so most of them sat on the floor in PE's office for about half a year. Several members of the band took copies here and there for friends and Mandy actually sold some to pay off some debts owed by Assrash for some artwork, which unfortunately showed up too late and too over budget to be used on the first pressing of the album.

When PE finally sold our 1700 of the 2000 records pressed, we then simply started selling the remaining band copies, which amounted to 183 left by that point. This was in October of 1997, about the time when Pignose first started harassing Mandy for Royalties. By February 1998, PE had sold all of the remaining Assrash LP's and paid the band, not only for LP's, but for their royalty copies of their 7" on PE and split EP with Fleas and Lice put out by Skuld. The total we owed the band was $1102.00, which split four ways to $275.50 paid to each member. Even after we paid each member of the band, Pignose continued to harass Mandy and then later Joe about getting more royalties and then claiming the band never got any copies of the record. Because the record was never repressed, there simply were no additional copies or royalties. Obviously Pignose is very confused about where the royalty money came from and possibly wrong in the assumption that the record was ever repressed, which it has not.

Just for the record, I dug up all the receipts and sales reports pertaining to the Assrash LP, which break down as follows:

Cost of Goods: ASSRASH LP
Recording = $630.00
Film / Proofs = $1030.00
Mastering = $300.00
Freight / Misc = $125.00
Pressing / printing = $4073.83
Total Cost = $6158.83
Sales and Profit
Gross Sales = $8753.25
Band Copies Sold = - $869.25
(183 x $4.75 )
Cost of Goods = - $6158.83
Bad Debt = - $236.13
(see "SHITLIST" in my column)
Total PE Net Earnings = $1489.04

Anyone who has ever put out a record in the DIY punk scene will tell you that it takes practically forever and a day to get your money back, if at all. The Assrash LP was one of the few releases on PE that did eventually pay for itself and even made some money. For most records to break even it takes several pressing, particularly if there are large amounts recording and artwork involved. Only about half the releases PE has put out actually have made any money back for the collective. Just in case anyone still has any illusions about PE making a lot of money from records, consider that all of the following were released at a LOSS: Sofahead LP, Sofahead 7", Atavistic LP, Moral Suckling LP, Internal Autonomy double 7", Negative Stance 7", Natural Cause 7", V/A "Think Globally, Act Locally" double 7", State of the Union 7", Coprofilia 7", Christdriver LP, Civil Disobedience LP, Manual Seven 7", State of the Union LP, and the Decrepit 12". It should also be said that in all cases the bands were paid their royalties in records, so technically they made more money than PE just by selling a single copy on their own.

I am not just writing this for Pignose, although I hope he does read it and we can smooth out this stupid shit between us. I think this is something that the over all scene should know, particularly to those who still think that DIY punk bands make heaps of money from what they do. A few bands on PE have made some money from their releases, but none have been even close to being able to live off the royalties, simply because there isn't that much money involved. From my own experience, the bands who make the most are the ones who actually get involved in the DIY part of it; by touring, selling records and T-shirts, and even putting out their own recordings when they can. That's how tours are funded, vans and equipment are bought, records are put out, etc. Very rarely is there anything left over for anything close to what you would call making a living. If you want to make money from your band, and you don't want to have to work for it, then you're pretty much going to have to sell your soul to a major label. If they'll have you.

In closing, I will mention that PE still owes some bands royalties for records that have sold before and after collective officially ended. As with all PE debts, I am working my ass off to make sure these are paid, but of course it has been a slow processes and will likely continue to be for some time now. PE Records is pretty much gone for good at this point, so very few records will remain in print much longer. My offer is still open to the bands on PE Records to have their recordings returned in exchange for half the recording cost, if applicable.

When Dan told me PE was making a comeback I lept for joy. After travelling a lot in the last two years I've seen how important PE has been in linking together the DIY punk scenes in disparate countries around the world. The fact is that as punks we have more in common with other punk kids in Argentina, South Korea or Norway than we do with mainstream citizens of our own countries. It has been argued that at its best the anarcho punk scene is a counter culture and in its current manifestation it is a truly global counter culture. I remember sitting in places like Malaysia and the Philippines thinking that PE stopped publishing a year or two too early, because in the next decade the punk scene will become more international and widespread than we ever imagined. Some may argue what relevance a culture of middle and working class youth protest originating in mid 70's America and England has to young people in China and Israel today. However, the undeniable fact is that like a deadly disease punk continues to spread and has a genuine appeal to kids around the world. Why? Because it is a culture of resistance, rebellion and non-conformity. In a world increasingly dominated by an extremely banal and insidious corporate culture oriented around consumption of the products of mega corporations punk offers young people a chance to think, act and be different and unique. Our music is more than just entertainment and our zines more than just words on paper to fill moments on the toilet, they are legitimate cries of outrage, protest and social criticism aimed at the doomed society in which we live. Our sense of style sets us apart as physically as our anti-authoritarian views set us apart politically. Although I was slow to embrace it, I feel the internet offers us a great resource to spread information, music and culture under the radar of the mainstream culture that is being shoved down our throats. As Lenin once said "The Capitalist will sell you the very rope you intend to hang him with." So the next decade looks bright for true DIY punk, our scene will continue to grow and become organized. After years of slumber the youth are finally getting restless and taking to the streets to protest the growing power of the corporate elite and their attempt to create a global plutocracy/police state. Next May Day we will take to the streets en masse around the world, and PE will be there to cover it. I can't wait for the May 2001 issue! I want to roll up a copy of this magazine and use it as a bull horn, stand on the corner of Lake and Bloomington and yell "Punks Not Dead! We're here to stay!"

I'm so sick of people looking at crusty hardcore records and telling me "This Discharge thing is played out man, who needs another record with stark black and white graphics of war victims and tortured animals" Well, we do. In this era of institutionalized violence we are so numb to man's inhumanity to man that atrocities and genocide are accepted as everyday occurences. Famine, rape, torture and massacre are no longer outrages to public opinion, they are merely statistics and sound bytes sandwiched in between commercial breaks. Nuclear war is not a "played out issue." Animal rights are not "overdone." The suffering of oppressed people in countries dominated by US backed regimes is not an "80's retro" issue. Look at the big pictureAIN'T A DAMN THING'S CHANGED! We still have all the same issues to protest against, and more urgent reasons to do so.

Looking back on the 90's we see a period in which aspects of punk culture were totally commodified by the mainstream. Punk Rock today is a household word. "Punk" bands like Offspring and Green Day have sold tens of millions of albums and played in huge stadiums. Ironically becoming the same pompous tools of the music business punk sought to overthrow in the mid 70's. I remember the days when Manic Panic and Doc Martens were unavailable in the USA (except in NYC) and you had to have sympathetic punks in England or NYC mail them to you. Now you can get that shit in every mall. Skateboarding used to be some sort of underground rebellious subculture, now it's as mainstream as Baseball. I remember getting beat up and harassed daily for having green hair and a pierced nose, now that's as socially acceptable as moustaches and flannel shirts. All of this commodification not only left the DIY punk scene intact, it strengthened it. Punk has made a great deal of progress in terms of organization and communication in the last ten years. I dug up my "tour diary" from the 1990 Destroy/Oi Polloi tour. We played nine shows in three weeks, mostly in clubs. The only DIY venues we played were a skate ramp in Dayton and ABC NO RIO. In those days you mostly dealt with "booking agents" at clubs. Most of whom had no clue when it came to punk. The tour was poorly organized and Oi Polloi lost a ton of money. Destroy got paid about 75 bucks for the whole tour. Luckily we brought some T-shirts and tapes to sell so we didn't starve. We actually brought only 50$ with us at the start of the tour. When I compare and contrast this to the sort of tours I'm organizing now it blows my mind. You can tour America for two months and still play every day. There are just that many places to play, bands to play with and people to help you set up shows. There is a network established now that just did not exist ten years ago, or at the least was in its infancy. Bands like Destroy, Antischism, Born Against and Rorschach went out on the road long before there was a network available to make it easy to tour. Nowadays, as we all know, such a network is well established, taken for granted and often abused. Especially by shitty bands that should stay home and practice for two more years before they leave the basement. One thing that hasn't changed is the prices of the shows and the merchandise. Despite everything else going up in price over the years, gas, tires, food, etc. shows still cost five bucks, 7"s still sell for 3$ and t shirts for 8$ or less. The DIY ethic is headed for a serious wake up call with gig prices. The time has come to admit that the five dollar show is an anachronism. Especially with today's gas prices.

In the realm of record distribution it seems like the DIY scene has finally gotten its shit together and things are running smoothly. I had lot of complaints about distributors a few years ago and very few now. Ebullition, Blackened and Sound Idea are all efficient, honest, reasonable and reliable distributors retail and wholesale of punk music and zines. I urge you all to support them. Gone are the days when shady distributors with no interest in punk like Relativity could swindle PE out of hundreds of Nausea albums. Bands today have unparralled access to a global audience. A record released in Sweden today will be on a turntable in New Zealand tomorrow if it has any merit at all. All this while labels like Epitaph and Victory move hundreds of thousands of copies of trite watered down mainstream music they call "punk" and "hardcore" No thanks. We've got the real, true hardcore punk right here, free from any outside interference and in control of our own destiny. The mainstream has proved unable to commodify true hardcore music, no doubt because mainstream music sucks so bad and hardcore rules. Well, let me put that another way. Hardcore is so fast, aggressive and anti social it has proved incredibly durable in terms of being ripped off and mass marketed. That is to say, our music is too extreme for a music business that wants to sell fake rebellion to middle class mall shoppers as "extreme music." Lucky for us Axiom and Life's Halt are not "radio friendly" or will the ever be. To my relief the mainstream is content to consume moronic sexist gangsta rap and repetitive mindless rap-metal ad nauseum.

Punk style has come under a crushing onslaught in the last ten years. Fat pants with patches on them are tolerated at gigs. Plaid skirts and pants are going the way of the buffalo. People are getting away with safety pinning patches to leather jackets instead of painting or studding them. Pants are worn over the boots instead of being rolled up over them. Look sharp here folks, don't let the mainstream drag down our cultural heritage.

Seriously, there is a larger issue here. The "store bought" punk look is now readily accessible at any "hot topic." You can acquire a punk "outfit" to stick in your closet next to your "rave" and "goth" outfits. The essence of punk style is that it is ours, it's different, and its largely home made. You can't manufacture studded and painted leather jackets in a factory. Like a medieval suit of armor each one is hand crafted, and unique to its wearer. The band logos and stud configurations on no two leather jackets are the same. An infinite variety. The same with tattoos. No two punks are expressing their individuality in totally uniform fashion. Contrast this to a Marilyn Manson show where 10,000 kids are wearing the same T-shirt. Punk is not about mail ordering a T-shirt from a web site, it's about learning how to screen print and making your own T-shirts in your basement for you and your friends to wear. Ironically, I learned to screen print to make Discharge T-shirts for me and my crew back in '84 and now I'm selling hundreds of T-shirts from my web site.

When I was in Berlin, Y@hoo pointed out to me that ten years ago there was a lot of hope for the anarcho punk movement really taking off in the 90's. The black block of the German Autonomen was held up as an example of anarchist organization that could be adapted to protest movements around the world. But in the intervening decade the anarcho punk movement evolved in to a really efficient means of selling T-shirts, patches and records. Lip service is paid to slogans and some lifestyles are altered. In the big picture nothing changed. A lot of kids dress better and have bigger record collections but the system has not been threatened. Yet.

Now a protest movement against global capitalism is growing and the anarcho punks are going to be a part of it. One thing that was recently pointed out to me is that the mainstream media is now blaming outrages against corporate property as the actions of "militant anarchists." At least we are finally getting some press. Ten years ago they would always blame any trouble on "communist agitators." And another thing, that communist shit is down for the count. They can all join Stalin in hell. The protest actions against the WTO and IMF today have their roots in the Stop the City, No Business As Usual and Black Block demos of the 80's. Lets hope that like France in 68 this protest movement can break out of the student/youth ghetto and attract disaffected members of the working class.

Punk has become increasingly diverse in the last ten or fifteen years. There are now dozens of sub genre's of punk with their own style, bands, zines and culture. I mean how many Earth Crisis or Promise Ring fans really know their music has its roots in the Clash and Minor Threat? This has led to one of our greatest advances in the scene over the last ten years. Victory over thugs in the scene. Sure there are still thugs here and there, but for the most part the Skinheads, Boneheads and whatever sort of thugs you used to have starting fights at shows and terrorizing kids are gone. They now have their own scene filled with thug bands to follow and fellow thugs to go thug-life on. A lot of the sort of meat-heads you used to see at shows during the cross over era are now attracted to jock core, rap-metal or whatever. And good fucking riddance. I know there are still problems with Nazis or hard liners or who ever in places here and there. However, it's nothing like the epidemic of violence that nearly killed the scene in the mid and late 80's. Let us never forget the days of 10 thugs being able to terrorize 200 punk kids at a show because no one was ready to stick their neck out and throw them out. One Scene Thug Free!

I hope I'm looking back on this column in PE number 100 and recounting my views on how much progress we have made since today, no one is going to do it for you, you have to Do It Yourself!

I didn't know that he'd called me a fucking bitch and had told me to shut up. Not too many strangers have the guts to call me a bitch and to tell me to shut up in the same sentence, let alone when I'm on stage with Aus Rotten talking about the issue or rape. We were getting ready to play a new song that I had written with Aus Rotten and I was talking about the song before we played it when a kid with a mohawk decided to call me a fucking bitch and tell me to shut up. Hey, anybody has the right to call me a bitch and anybody has the right to tell me to shut up. That's their opinion and they're more then welcome to have it. But anybody wanting to do that had better make damn sure that they come right up to my face and say what they need to say because trust me: I will have an opinion to send right back at ya'. It wasn't until after the show that I actually found out what had been said. And yes, I did find the kid and let him know in extreme detail and at high volume how I felt about his little comment.

Once I stopped yelling at the kid and after he'd apologized a few times, we actually ended up talking for awhile. I explained to him why I was talking about the song and the importance that the lyrics hold for me. The song is called "The Second Rape". Aus Rotten had given me a tape and asked me to write lyrics to music that Corey had specifically written for me to express myself. I sat in my living room playing the tape over and over until like a floodgate opening, the words just poured out of me and onto paper. It was almost as if the song was already written inside of me somewhere and had just been looking for a chance to be released. The term "the second rape" refers to the way that women are treated after they've been sexually assaulted. Police officers, hospital workers, the court systems... even friends and family. Often, there is a blame that is placed on the shoulders of women who have been raped. Questions like "What were you wearing? Were you drinking? Did you know him? Why were you walking around that late at night anyway? Why did you go with him back to his room? Why didn't you fight? Why didn't you scream? Why didn't you stop him?" are all questions that get asked of rape victims and every single one of those questions places guilt and responsibility onto the woman. It is a brutalizing experience to be so vulnerable and to feel so violated after you've been raped. When those feelings are perpetuated and compounded by a group of strangers who push your face further into the shit you're already drowning in, it can be almost as damaging as the actual rape itself.

Imagine how that must feel. You are in overwhelming physical pain from the physical act of rape. Your whole perception of the world and your place in it has been torn apart. Feelings of safety and security have been ripped from you. You feel as if you are not in control of yourself anymore because someone came along and took that control away from you so completely. So brutally. So exactly. And then you get thrown into the court system and it happens to you all over again. You are made to feel as if you asked to be raped. As if you were just strolling the streets at night hoping and praying some guy would come along and violate you. As if the clothes you were wearing were some secret invitation to rape. That if you'd simply been more assertive or stronger, you could have stopped the assault from happening. You are somehow responsible. You are somehow guilty. You are totally to blame.

If you think this only happens in the court systems or with the police, then take a close look around you and listen to what's being said. "The second rape" also occurs amongst family and friends alike. This mentality of placing blame on the woman after sexual assault completely infiltrates the punk scene too. I've heard shit said at parties and at shows that makes my fucking stomach turn. Anything from subtle comments that downplay the fact that a rape occurred to someone actually saying that they told a guy "no" and that he went ahead and did it anyway. I've listened to punks place the blame on the woman after a rape has occurred. Anything from "Well, she knew him so how could it be rape?" or "They used to date each other so that can't be rape." or "She was pretty fucking wasted. Did you see how she was acting? What else could she expect?" Comments like these shift the blame away from men and put it on the woman who was raped. But you know what? I want any woman reading this to understand something: You are not to blame. You are not responsible. You are not guilty of the crime. You didn't ask for this. It is not your fault. Don't ever let anyone try to tell you that it is. And if anyone ever tries to make you feel that you are to blame, scream at the top of your lungs. Scream to drown out whatever they're saying. Scream to release your rage. Make sure that they understand that they're to blame for perpetuating a culture of rape in the punk scene.

That kid who called me a bitch and told me to shut up didn't want to hear what I had to say about rape when I was talking about it on stage. But you know what? There is so much that needs to be confronted and so much that needs to be said about sexual assault that I plan to never shut up about it. As long as women I know are being assaulted, I won't shut up. As long as I have to step outside my door and feel fear and feel threatened by the act of rape, I won't shut up. I will keep speaking and writing and singing and screaming about this topic until I begin to feel as if something in this world is beginning to change. Until we all begin to talk about this and discuss this and find the creative solutions to the problem within our own scene and within the world at large. If you have any feedback or comments, please feel free to write or e-mail me.

Peace/equality, Adrienne / PO Box 20875 / Tompkins Square Station /New York City, NY 10009 -or- scullypugs@juno.com

FROM DUSK UNTIL DAWN

by Joe Blaas

Profane Existence is back from the Dead! When I received the message that Profane Existence Magazine is back I was very happily surprised. Profane Existence was always a very important thing to me, the zine as well as the label with the records they released. Both things have been an influence to me and to decisions I have made. I have been following Profane Existence now for more than 7 years, it has been one of the first zines I read as a young punk, PE released one of my all time favorite records, the Nausea 'Extinction' Album, and because of Profane Existence I started the Distribution, which I am still running.

The zine was, and I really hope that it will again be, an important instrument to the do-it-yourself hardcore punk community. One of the most important things in my opinion was, and I think still is, the distribution and contribution network. Although there have often been problems with people not paying, not responding or problems with money for postage, the PE collective has always been able to have the zine distributed really well without having any distribution contracts or huge distributors. It has just been people that cared about helping out with distribution and simply did it. Everywhere around the world you could find an issue of Profane Existence, and everywhere have been people contributing with local information. I hope that it will again be possible to have the zine supported by such a network, because this is what made, and hopefully makes again, PE such a good fanzine.

Since the last issue of PE came out in late 1998 a lot of things happened here in Austria, and I thought some of you might be interested what happened in the meantime.

Since February 2000, Austria has a new government, for the first time in history a coalition of the Austrian People's Party (OEVP) and the right-wing Austrian Freedom Party (FPOE). In the 1980's there has once been a coalition between the Social Democrats and the Austrian Freedom Party, but since this was not very successful for the FPOE, their leader Jorg Haider changed the whole party from a conservative liberal party into a populist right-wing party. So for the first time in more than 50 years, since the end of World War 2, the government has been built up by conservative, religious, populist and right-wing politicians. More information about the new Austrian government hopefully in the next issue of PE.

Of course also a few things in the Austrian DIY scene happened. So let's start with what I remember that ended and broke up. Sacro Egoismo Records closed down their Store, but the mailorder distribution is still running, the zines Ex's Digest and Cracked are no longer published. The bands Konstrukt and Prohaska both broke up about a year ago, and one really cool club for having shows in Vienna, the TU-Club, had to shut down.

But of course new projects started, there is a new cool Record and Skateboard Store in Vienna named Yummy. Some new bands started hitting the stage, to name a few: Programm C, Kobayashi, Mar or Aniemoation. A new collective found together and is just starting to work on setting up shows and distributing records.

Because of the political situation a lot of people came together to fight against the new government, new networks and groups have been established and are more active than any groups in the last few years.

Also a lot of things in terms of animal liberation happen lately, festivals, demonstrations and actions are organized regularly and also an Austrian group of Food Not Bombs started.

The EKH, Vienna's best place for shows and the only squat in town, just celebrated its 10th anniversary. There are of course more things planned for the future, like opening a new record store in Vienna, starting a new zine, some new bands found together and just started practicing, so things are still moving here. If you are looking for contacts in Austria, there are quite a lot of addresses in BYOFL #8 or in the BYOFL Internet version.

If you want to contact me, feel free to write me at the Existence Distribution address.

"To the Age its Art, to Art its Freedom" - Ludwig Hevesi 1898, written over the portals of the Secession in Vienna proclaiming the Artists aims.

This motto was chosen by a group of Artists that made up the Secessionists, which were a wonderful collective of artists - mostly painters, sculpturists and designers - in Vienna 1897 until ca. 1910. The most important artists were Gustav Klimt, Otto Wagner, Josef Hoffmann, Arnold Schoenberg (shite, I want my Umlaut-Keys back), Josef Olbrich and Kolo Moser, I'm sure you must have heard of either one or two already. Anyway, I don't intend to get too much into the History of Art department about Art Nouveau now, I have chosen this opening Quote because I just read it again in the news. It has always kind of inspired me in the past, and I always thought it's such a right on statement for a group of artists to write on its fucking portal as the official mantra. And now, as I sit here in a small room far away from my hometown, reading Austrian news-sites, I hear it again. I smile. I giggle! I piss my pants!! The FPÖ, Austria's Freedom Party that used to be lead by the famous Mr Haider, a political party that now in the year 2000 is part of the Coalition, has decided that they cannot support the Secession (now a gallery of Avant-Garde artists and still showing Klimt's Beethoven-Frieze) because of said Motto (!). Does it ring a bell?

Yes ladies and gentlemen, welcome to 1934 or something akin to that, the FPÖ is trying to be "the ordinary citizen's" so-called willing listener and subsequently, his loudest mouth, and they're good at it. The world again knows - or believes it knows - where Austria's heart beats...on the right side. But this is not true, this is why I am writing this column right now, I want to quickly tell you all what really is going on.

First and foremost, I keep getting asked "Is it true that Fascists have taken over the Austrian government?" NO IT IS NOT. The media all over the world makes people believe utter nightmares, and it makes me angry that I keep getting confronted with this teutonic stereotype. The FPÖ is NOT a Nazi-Party, however it sympathises with a lot of issues that are indeed to be found again in History Books written after 1945...

In the October 3, 1999 general elections, Haider and the FPÖ enjoyed an extremely strong showing. The FPÖ is emerging in a second-place tie with the ruling coalition People's Party, having obtained at least 27 % of the popular vote (I AM NOT 27 %, a popular sticker among right on Austrians). The Freedom Party will gain 12 parlimentary seats, a total of 53. The ruling Social Democrats, while maintaining their first-place position, were left with the smallest lead since World War II. On February 1, 2000, Joerg Haider's Freedom Party and People's Party announced they were joining to form a governing coalition.

Bang! How could this happen? Immediatly, people went on the streets to demonstrate against this coalition, and it seemed that something was happening in Austria at that time. Of course, up until now people were still showing their anti-government stickers and badges with, ahem, pride, but February and March was quite crazy. For the first time during a Demonstration in Austria teargas,or something like that, was used. But still, the main question is unanswered, HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN? A Party with a leader that keeps saying things like "The Africans who come here are drug dealers and they seduce our youth,"; "We've got the Poles who concentrate on car theft," he claims. "We've got the people from the former Yugoslavia who are burglary experts. We've got the Turks who are superbly organized in the heroin trade. And we've got the Russians who are experts in blackmail and mugging.", someone who appears on campaign posters (for the 1999 general election) with his prime ministerial candidate Thomas Prinzhorn as "Two real Austrians". Fucking amazing, isn't it? He also thinks that the Waffen-SS was a "respectable" organisation. What a great man.

Yet still, he manages to slip through as an okay person, with 27 % voting for him. He finally made it into the Coalition. Hell, even I say that he's not a Nazi, well what the fuck is wrong with me then? Nothing, I tell you, I'm just someone who is very careful with what words people use, and -isms as a whole make things oh-so easy for people trying to make a political statement.

Whereas I, as someone who absolutely hates and despises the Austrian Government as it is, I won't let anyone put this -ism label on Austrians, and eventually, me. A Nazi (National Socialist) is someone who hails with the right arm high, who scribbles Swastikas on walls or who writes Manifestos against Jews, who poses in front of Red, White and Black Banners. Joerg Haider does not do that, none of his fellow FPÖ-lers does that. They just happen to be extremely dumb, moronic, ignorant and xenophobic arseholes. THIS DOES NOT MAKE THEM ANY BETTER THAN NAZIs, no no, but do you begin to realise what I am talking about?

Do not give them what they want, which is significance. Do not fear them. Tell them they're idiots but don't give them the opportunity to be seen on 29 covers of all international newsweeks and times and le mondes and spiegels. Because this is what really made them big. This is or was their tactic (baby, they're not gonna make it again anymore). However, I'm not telling you to not vote for Haider because, well, I'm not writing this for Austrians, all I'm telling you, the Readers in the US and all over the world to not tell around that there's a Nazi sitting in a European Country's Government. Joerg Haider and the FPÖ are a bunch of fucking stupid xenophobic arseholes and it definitely sucks that they have gained that much power. The whole world, mainly fellow countries of the European Union are boycotting Austria and it is totally okay, but they also use Austria as a stickfigure to distract others of each own country's xenophobic behaviour, and this cannot be right. EVERY country has their shit on their sticks, be it Germany, France or Poland. I am not defending the FPÖ or Haider. But, as a very good German Zine called PLOT once said:

"Shit remains shit and needs to be called out by its Name". No matter if its left or right.

Peace Out. Daniel E.

I.) Write me at danieloquence@hotmail.com and go to http://www.monochrom.at/eloquence with your electronic pilgrim sandals.
II.) I don't intend to write about Austria forever, it actually pisses me off and I'm glad I'm in another country now (which also has its very bad remarks, but que serra..), however if you are interested in finding out more on this subject, feel free to email me or go to http://gegenschwarzblau.cjb.net to find a whole bunch of good links. Cheers.
III.) The Day I wrote this, July 1st 2000, Walter Matthau died. I loved that man, he and Jack Lemmon are my favorite Actors of all time, and I really was shocked when I heard about it. Go watch Buddy Buddy, Front Page or the Odd Couple NOW. R.I.P. Walter Matthau.

Punk Single Parenting

A little background: I am the single father of a beautiful two-year-old child. As punks, our views are often out of step with society. I intend to use this column to talk about how I have dealt with trying to instill my beliefs onto my son, while fighting how society attempts to condition him.

My wife and myself were both strict vegetarians when our son was born, and we both excitedly planned to raise a child who had never let a single piece of meat pass his lips. However, some time after my wife left me, she decided that being vegetarian was no longer important to her, and began feeding our son meat when he was with her. I found out about this when my son and I walked past a McDonalds, and he told me he wanted a cheeseburger.

The most important thing when dealing with a disagreement with the other parent is to NEVER say to the child that the other parent is wrong, or that their behavior is improper. The best case scenario is to first contact the other parent and try to work out some sort of compromise with them. However, my sons mother had no interest in changing her behavior. So the next time my son asked me for a cheeseburger, I told him that Daddy doesnt like cheeseburgers, because cheeseburger are made out of cows, and Daddy likes cows. Small children are very imitative, and love to do what their parents do (keep that in mind at all times, theyll pick up your worst habits), so my son immediately replied that he didnt like cheeseburgers either. I got him something else to eat, and then I read him a book about cows. Animals fascinate small children, and I believe that most children would choose not to eat meat if they understood where it came from. I never told my son what to do or think, or that his mother was wrong, I tried to explain to him in terms that he could understand what I believe and why I believe it. I also tried to explain everything very simply, and avoid scaring the child or being heavy-handed. Every time he ask to eat something made out of meat now, I try to do the same thing again.

The next time I was with my son, he told me that he didnt eat cows, but that his grandfather liked to eat them. I cannot control what happens to my son when he is not with me; my solution is far from perfect. I know that his other family still feeds him meat. But, I have started him questioning where meat comes from, and helped him realize that even at two, he can make choices about how he wants to be treated.

Although most vegetarian parents will not experience opposition from the other parent, animal cruelty is everywhere in our society, and children will experience pressure to eat meat from well meaning relatives or their friends. Children do not like to be dictated to, using these same techniques should help make the children understand why you want a particular thing for them.

Lastly, many childrens books and movies are full of great vegetarian propaganda. Although I havent had a chance to see it yet, Chicken Run is about a bunch of chickens trying to escape being made into chicken pies. Babe and Charlottes Web are also two other movies that are great for illustrating points. If anyone wants to discuss anything, I can be e-mailed at: witchbabies@my-deja.com.